A Success Story

 

This is a story that shows how we don’t always acknowledge our our brilliance.  It comes from a  friend who was describing what happened to her recently.  This made me think about how show our light and how we show up

 

After more than 20 years’ working for myself, the opportunity arose to use my skills in a new context and work as part of a team, all of which I wanted. While I had loved being my own boss, the treadmill of having to do everything myself (particularly generating new business constantly) was starting to get to me. Also, while I still loved what I did, I really wanted a new challenge. A move abroad gave me all this and initially I was pleased and proud to have secured a great job in a different sector, beating off 5 contenders.

 

For the first few months, the novelty of working in a small, lively company with great colleagues in a superb location made me very happy. When asked ‘How’s the job?’, I honestly answered that I was loving it. Within the first few months I had a big project to accomplish, which was challenging and took all my time and energy. Once that was completed, the workflow slowed down and after a few months I realised I didn’t have enough to do and I was bored.

 

I was afraid of admitting my insufficient workload to my boss, for fear my four days would be reduced, or that he might realise that this new position he had created was, in fact, no longer needed. However, when and where appropriate, I suggested helping my colleagues in different ways, but this didn’t really tackle the heart of the problem.

A change machine

It was only when I was caught off guard by a friend asking how the job was going and answered, ‘Actually, I’m bored out of my mind’ that I realised I had been avoiding facing up to the reality. The other reality was that I had considerable financial commitments and could not afford to consider leaving the job and could not face job hunting again.

 

I didn’t give much thought to the annual assessment which my boss was about to carry out. I did prepare a list of all the things I had accomplished, more in a defensive way, in case I was challenged about the use of my time. He took the wind out of my sails by starting the conversation with ‘You do realise that you are the next best paid person here, after the Directors, don’t you?’ I actually had no idea how my pay compared with others’. While I was being paid well, salaries in this city are high, as the cost of living is extremely high, so, no, I didn’t realise that. He went on to say that he felt sometimes I did rather menial tasks and at that salary, he was looking to me for initiatives and great ideas.

 

Nothing radical happened immediately but over time, I realised that I had been viewing my position in the company, my status if you like, as that akin to an admin assistant (not that there’s anything wrong with that – it’s a hugely valuable role, but one I’m not suited to). I was waiting for instructions, rather than making suggestions, yet I blamed my boss for treating me as if I was not significant in the company. He on the other hand was probably responding to my behaviour and in fact was wanting and waiting for more.

 

Amazingly, from that day, I have been busy and much more interested. I suggested an initiative which has taken off and looks as though it will be a success. I behave more like a Director and in fact am party to most of their meetings and decisions. I always remember an exercise I did with a coach some years ago about status (not in the social class sense) which demonstrated that people treat you according to how you project yourself. Not surprising really, as that’s all they have to go on.

thunbs up pdf

I was surprised that this happened to me. I’m a really confident, outgoing person and was used to dealing at Director level throughout my career as a consultant. Entering a different world, with no knowledge of the sector, no advocates, no network and in the latter stage of my career, really undermined my confidence. So I would say, you have to believe in yourself, remind yourself that you have capabilities which got you the job in the first place and find opportunities to display other talents which may be hidden away.

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